雅思写作:玩游戏到底是好仍是欠好


时间:2018/12/6
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       题目:

  some people think that playing computer games only have negative effects on children, while others believe that it may also have positive influence on children's development.discuss both views and give your own opinion.

  范文结构解析

  第一段:先陈述电脑游戏越来越受欢迎这一现象,然后明确表达自己的观点“打电玩的好处是不可以忽略的。”

  第二段:详细阐述玩电脑游戏的好处之一:刺激大脑的开发。

  第三段:详细阐述玩电脑游戏的好处之二:就业的时候可以选择游戏制作等相关行业。如“微微一笑很倾城”里的肖奈大神,你们懂的。

  第四段:详细阐述玩电脑游戏的好处之三:游戏里设计的一些互动也可以使内向的青少年变得善谈。

  第五段:简要提出反方观点:打游戏对视力不好,并且耗时较多。

  第六段:结尾段,再次用新颖的语言明确阐明自己的观点,并针对打游戏的问题扼要提出解决方案,结尾段升华了。

  原版范文

  大家可以先一口气读一遍没有做笔记的原文,然后我们再详细标注一下可以吸收的点。

  Word Count (362)

  Various computer games have gained tremendous popularity among children nowadays. Although the negative impacts on children are generally acknowledged, the blessings of playing computer games are just too obvious to be ignored.

  An advantage is that this practice can trigger the healthy activities in their brains. As games require abilities such as decision-making, problem-solving and rational planning, to mention but a few, a circumstance is that some of these mental abilities can be consciously and effectively cultivated in the games instead of in class.

  Another point that should be noticed is that the industry of online games has become so prosperous that numerous jobs emerged related to the game production. A growing number of game players are devoting themselves to the profession of game industry. Some of them even become millionaires such as the CEO of Evochron Alliance. Only those who perform well in certain sophisticated games can stand better chances in hunting a satisfactory job relevant with online games in this severely-competing employment market.

  In addition, lack of personal skills is one of the most serious defects that we have ever known about today’s students. Some computer games have already allowed the players to communicate and interact with each other in the community designed in the game. One benefit is that children who originally dared not to socialize with strangers are already willing to and able to have social intercourse with others. Thus, it is not surprising that they become more extroverted and conversable.

  However, under no circumstances can we ignore the downsides of playing computer games. It is undoubtedly detrimental to the children’s eye-sight if they sit in front of the screen for a long time and it is so time-consuming as they are eager to upgrade their levels that parents and teachers will without a doubt complain about the time wasted on the games.

  In conclusion, although we should not slacken our vigilance against the drawbacks of playing computer games, the positive functions of it should also be sufficiently recognized. It would thus behoove parents and teachers to shoulder their responsibilities to cultivate the children’s time management skill, making them able to keep a balance between game and life.

  解析版范文

  下面我们再来看一看详细解析版,看看你刚才看出这些了吗?

  Various computer games have gained tremendous popularity(获得巨大的流行度,常用短语,代替sth has become more and more popular这种俗的有伤风化的短语) among children nowadays. Although the negative impacts on children are generally acknowledged, theblessings (可代替advantages)of playing computer games are just too obvious to be ignored(写作常用观点句).

  An advantage is that this practice can(写作常用结构句) trigger the healthy activities in their brains(电脑相关话题常用的观点---刺激大脑的健康活动). As games require abilities such as decision-making, problem-solving and rational planning(观点延深的办法之一---并列举例), to mention but a few, (常用插入语)a circumstance is that some of these mental abilities can be consciously and effectively(多用副词可加分) cultivated (培养---写作必备单词)in the games instead of in class.

  Another point that should be noticed is that(写作常用结构句)the industry of online games(谈到电玩我们必须要谈谈现在特别火的游戏产业) has become so prosperous that numerous jobs emerged related to the game production. A growing number of game playersare devoting themselves to(献身于) the profession of game industry. Some of them even become millionaires such as the CEO of Evochron Alliance. Only those who perform well in certain sophisticated games can stand better chances in hunting(这个短语要学会用---更有机会做某事) a satisfactory job relevant with online games in this severely-competing employment market.

  In addition, lack of personal skills is one of the most serious defects(缺陷) that we have ever known(多用完成时可加分) about today’s students. Some computer games have already allowed the players to communicate and interact with (互动)each other in the community designed in the game. One benefit is that children who originally dared not tosocialize with (社交)strangers are already willing to and able to(这种并列结构可以学着用) have social intercourse with(把动词名词化使用) others. Thus, it is not surprising that(写作常用过渡句)they become more extroverted and conversable(外向和健谈).

  However, under no circumstances can we ignore the downsides of(用倒装来表达的写作结构句) playing computer games. It is undoubtedly detrimental(加分副词和形容词放在一起了) to the children’s eye-sight if they sit in front of the screen for a long time and it is so time-consuming(耗时的) as they are eager to upgrade their levels that parents and teachers will without a doubt(插入语要用得自然) complain about the time wasted on the games.

  In conclusion, although we should not slacken our vigilance against the drawbacks of(大作文高分级别结构句---尽管我们不能削弱对什么什么东西的警觉性) playing computer games,the positive functions of it should also be sufficiently recognized(高分结构句). It would thusbehoove(外教喜欢用这个词表示某人应该做某事) parents and teachers to shoulder their responsibilities to cultivate the children’s time management skill, making them able to keep a balance between game and life(提出问题的解决方案,结尾段升华了亲们!).

  好了,这篇文章就详细分析到这里,希望文中一些内容会让你有所收获或有所感悟。下次有机会我们再一起学习新的内容。




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